Posted on 02 August 2012 23:50
This time, four years ago..
Andy had not been out for months. I mean *months*. I had been in and out of hospital with threatened prem labour, and a couple of full on heart stopping moments (including being told that they were taking me to Newcastle via ambulance at 27 weeks..from Cheltenham.. because that was the closest hospital with two neonatal beds and a labour bed! But yea.. sure..close those smaller units, its not like we need them..but I digress)
Caesarian was scheduled for Tuesday.. 36+3 to avoid any more grief, keep things nice and calm etc.
Duncan invited Andy out for a drink, as was last weekend before babies were due. Andy is not a big drinker – he had four pints and was decidedly wobbly and very pleased with himself.
I took myself off to bed.
Not a small task. I was by this point visible on Google Earth. The only item of clothing I could get my bump into was a kaftan I had to order from the states. Oh the shame. (I should point out that I am 4′ 10” tall, which left the twins not a lot of room to spread upwards…so they went out!)
I had an E-Cup bra size. Totally wasted, couldn’t see a thing. Eclipsed by baby belly the size of a not so small country. Gutting.
I was, however, only 7lbs heavier than when I got pregnant. Have to love twin pregnancy metabolism. (Oh. Possibly gestational diabetes may have helped too.. v annoying when addicted to mangos. *sigh*)
..anyway.. I took myself off up to bed, deciding reading a book, surrounded by a mountain of pillows, supporting everything humanly possible in an attempt to get something approaching comfortable, was preferable to dealing with drunk husband. Much as I love him. (By this point there are more pillows and .. well… me than will allow him to sleep in our king size bed. He is relegated to the spare bed. I do remind him it was his idea to have a baby in the first place when this gets mentioned.)
So I am chilling out, feeling v good actually, enjoying my book. I feel an almighty kick (I thought) accompanied by an uncomfortable head-to-the-cervix jolt.
Great! True to form, I am about ready to sleep and its playtime. I have already almost forgotten what a complete night’s sleep is. I haven’t had one since I got pregnant. Either stress, getting up to wee,stress,panic,wtf twins,more wee,acid indigestion(I slept with gaviscon next to my bed)and nightly pogo dancing later on (babies obviously. Not hubby – or he would have been out of the bed considerably earlier) has kept me awake for the past 36 weeks.
I shift my weight slightly. (Mammoth task). Doesn’t feel quite right. Uh oh.
I get out of bed (reluctantly.. and it takes a while). My waters pour everywhere.
I check the bed. (I mean come on! Who wouldn’t?!) luckily dry. Thank feck for that..!
I hop about (adrenaline is a wondrous thing) saying’ Oh no.. Oh no..nnooo nono.. oh feck, oh no’
I realise that is not going to achieve anything or make it all go away.
Sudden urge to go to the bathroom.
Get out, first contraction hits. Completely Hollywood style. You know.. those films where her waters break and she goes immediately into full blown labour, and we all scoff.. like yea, right! Well that was me. Feck!
Second contraction exactly 1 min 30 seconds after the first.
I start to make it down the stairs, get halfway and call to Andy. Water everywhere.
I take a minute or two to convince him that this is for real. I am not winding him up.
He laughs supportively. Fairly smashed. Ok, rather a lot tbh.
He goes and gets the house phone for me, and a towel…
Hubby proceeds to follow me about the house giggling while I organise a lift (YES A LIFT. Someone could not drive, funnily enough). I phone my parents after, wake them up. They live 3 hours away up north but I wanted them to know something was happening. Share the joy and all that!
Hubby continues to follow me giggling while holding towel. Neighbour arrives with her grown up daughter. Her daughter babysits, neighbour and hubby help me into her car.
Am sitting on 3 towels and 2 bin liners. Contractions still 1 min 30 apart and bricking it!
Thankfully rest of the story was fairly uneventful I was examined not long after arrival, 40 mins after my waters initially went, and was 6cm, Reuben was presenting. They cleared theatre.. opened the sun roof.. and my two little beauties arrived.
Now after a start like that.. why on EARTH would I not expect buttons and calpol drama, to name but two?
Happy Birthday Reuben and Barnaby.. although we are not telling you its your birthday until Saturday because that is when we are having your party.. but still (We can get away with that this year at least)
..and Happy surviving 4 years of twindom Andy Fletcher! It’s one hell of a rollercoaster – but I don’t think I would ever want to get off! (Don’t quote me on that next time I am in casualty/called into school/whatever the next drama will be!)